A new baby coming into your life and home is a great blessing, the beginning of a wonderful adventure and a time of expanded learning and growing for the whole family. As the arrival of your beautiful little baby draws close you might be experiencing mixed emotions.
There may be great excitement and anticipation mixed with tinges of anxiety, impatience and even doubt and fear. At this stage many mothers can inevitably feel more connected to the process than dads, who can sometimes feel left out of the equation or unsure of the nature and importance of their unique role in the family and how to bond with the baby.
Embrace Virtues is intended to encourage, support and nurture you both through this first challenging twelve months, and to reassure you that you are exactly the right parents for this baby and that your best efforts will be good enough.
May you and your baby benefit from your efforts at remaining calm and peaceful and practising patience as you wait for the joyous and safe arrival of your precious baby.
warmest love and blessings to you and your family
As you await the arrival of your baby, it is useful to refer to virtues definitions and affirmations. This month is a great opportunity to practise both patience and peacefulness. You will be amazed at the sense of peace and inspiration you can experience simply by reading the definition and the affirmation for each virtue.
Since we know that your baby can hear voices and music, if you read the virtues aloud, your baby benefits from hearing both the virtues information and your voice. Unborn babies have been shown to recognise and be soothed by their parents’ voices and some mothers like to spend a little time each day relaxing and focusing on their (unborn) child.
A parent and baby will both benefit from setting aside this quiet ‘communication time’ each day. You might like to use relaxing music, sing quiet lullabies, or simply talk softly to your baby to tell them how you are feeling, how you are looking forward to meeting them and how you are practising being calm and peaceful, just as you hope they will feel when they finally arrive.
‘I am trying so hard to be patient right now, but I just can’t wait to meet you. Let’s listen to this beautiful music together and we’ll both feel calm and peaceful.’
It is important for the baby to hear their dad’s voice also, and dads who take time to talk directly to their unborn child are taking the first steps in the unique and important father-baby bonding process. The great bonding opportunity that awaits you as a dad is to be present at the birth. Initial skin-to-skin contact with your baby on your chest is a wonderful way to connect with your newborn.
Understanding and practising patience is an antidote to anxiety and stress. Your baby is sensitive to emotions – both positive and negative and will be subtly aware of your state of wellbeing. Everyone will benefit if you can remain calm, peaceful, grateful and positive. Creating a vision for yourself that you say each day will help enormously, such as: ‘I live in quiet hope and expectation that all will be well. My baby and I are healthy and happy.’
Waiting dads also report the need to find additional patience during this time. Pregnancy causes women to focus inwards and it can sometimes feel like the person you thought you knew really well has disappeared – fortunately this is only a temporary disappearance!
Some parents have found that the music they use during relaxation time in the pregnancy is soothing for the baby once they are born, and it has been suggested that babies can recall the feeling of warmth and security from the womb when they hear the music played. Harmonious, positive, progressive thoughts and feelings are helpful for both parents and baby at this time. Without a word being spoken the mother’s feelings transmit to the baby, simply because the baby attunes to the feelings of their mother. This is why the mother is called the first educator of the child. The first lesson of the baby is to emotionally attune to the mother.
There is also great power in touch. Some families find pre-natal massage a way to reduce stress, relax and bond together. By incorporating peaceful massage pre-birth, mum’s gain emotional support and physical nurturing, which is directly passed on to baby. Massage is a lovely way to involve older children and partners, who can be encouraged to gently massage the mum’s abdomen and perhaps sing songs or tell stories to their sibling-to-be.
baby’s spiritual and character education starts now
Prayer and peaceful blessings can soothe you and your baby. It is believed that language development begins in the womb – where babies first hear spoken words. So why not begin now to read inspired words, blessings and affirmations from the great spiritual teachers to your baby.
Blessings can form a beautiful ritual for you and your baby to share each morning and evening. If the soul is created at the moment the baby is conceived then we can begin to bless that soul’s development as soon as we know it exists.
make the most of uninterrupted time
These last weeks of waiting are an opportunity to take some quiet reflective time to pamper and nurture yourself in preparation for the important and demanding role ahead.
Choose simple, lovely things that appeal to you such as meditation, aroma therapy, massage, prayer, listening to music, singing, yoga, walking or whatever works for you. It may be the last opportunity for uninterrupted reading time for quite a while, so choose a good book! The main thing is to give yourself permission for some reflective and quiet time each day, knowing that you are doing this for your baby as well as for yourself.
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